Making a promise to myself
I’m not going to eat bad foods anymore and I’m going to try to do ab exercises and run. I’m going to have the most perfect body by summer.
my love for this boy grows everyday. i never thought i would fall this hard for him but i’m glad i did. i love everything about him and i miss him so much. i don’t think i know any couple who loves each other as much as eshai and i do. weve been through so much together and hes honestly my everything. he makes my world complete. i can’t wait until i get to see him again, although i do wish i wasn’t as attached as i am but what can you do..?
also jamie is an amazing friend and i love her. she has been so supportive and helpful and understanding.
follow her, shes the most beautiful person in the world inside and out
besides losing my dad this past week has been the most scary/sad/stressful week of my life. literally i was the only one who could make his bail, and i did. im so proud of myself for being able to take initiative like that. also dealing with laws and public defenders and his family has been so insane. i’m probably the best girlfriend in the entire world, and maybe now hell believe i’m here and i care. i did so much that wasn’t my responsibility, but i did it anyways because i love him and i’m the only person that honestly could.
15,000 in four days.
thats gonna be my motto for i can get through anything and accomplish whatever i need to.
I’ve learned something from one of my good friends:
If you truly love someone and they truly love you don’t give up on the relationship. Even if it’s stressful, because in the end you’ll regret it. Relationships require work but they are worth it…you don’t ever want to feel like you lost something so special because you didn’t want to deal with issues.
I’ve been really up and down about what I want and what I should do, but I never want to feel like I lost someone so incredibly special over something dumb. I don’t want to live with those regrets.
And on another note, I honestly hope you follow through with everything you told me.
feeling like you cant trust anyone is a horrible feeling
I need to think about this as a positive thing. I’ve learned how much I really care and love you. I’m done not appreciating you or showing you love. You have been so loving and supportive and I just want you to believe that I’m going to be like that too. You always say you’re going to marry me, or have my kids, and that you will love me forever. I can honestly say I want those same things too now. Not being able to talk or see you has driven me to the conclusion that I don’t want to ever live without you. You make me feel like no one ever could.
I miss my old eshai. I just want my loving baby back, things have been so difficult but I know everything will work out. I just have to trust in the love we have for each other.
